You Don’t Owe the Old You a Damn Thing

Leticia Francis Author

A love letter and a goodbye. You don’t owe the old you a damn thing. It’s time to release the survival identity and reclaim your power.

There comes a moment in every healing journey when you realize

You’ve outgrown your own survival.

You wake up one morning, and the armor that used to feel protective now feels suffocating. The strength you wore like a badge of honor now feels like a burden. The habits that kept you alive are now keeping you stuck.

And the scariest part?

You’ve worn this identity for so long, you don’t know who you are without it.

Let me tell you something real…

I used to believe that loyalty to my past made me humble.

That if I honored the girl who endured abuse, betrayal, abandonment, and bone-deep grief, I was being grateful. But let’s be clear:

Gratitude is not the same as bondage.

And staying stuck in your past because it feels familiar is not a flex. It’s a trap.

💔 The Night I Knew I Had to Let Her Go

I was 26, sitting in a jail cell, not because I had committed a crime, but because the man I loved had relapsed on crack cocaine and dragged me into his chaos.

He disappeared, and I was left holding the mess.

When my mother came to see me, she didn’t ask if I was okay. She didn’t ask how long I’d be there. She just looked at me with tears in her eyes and asked: “Why do you love everyone more than you love yourself?”

That question echoed in my bones for days.

And when I finally sat with it, alone, on a cold cot, no distractions, no delusions, I realized: I had been living on autopilot. Responding. Reacting. Surviving.

I wasn’t making decisions. I was managing disasters. I wasn’t living. I was coping.

💣 The Old Me Was a Warrior But She Was Also Wounded

She knew how to endure. How to fix. How to function with a broken heart and a fractured spirit.

She knew how to smile while bleeding. How to shrink to make others comfortable. How to hustle for love that should’ve been given freely.

She kept me alive through things no woman should ever have to endure.

But she also kept me small.

Because she didn’t believe peace was safe. She thought chaos meant love. She confused pain with purpose.

And if I had stayed loyal to her… I would’ve never become who I am today.

🥀 The Love Letter & The Goodbye

So here it is, my final thank you.

To the version of me who…

• Stayed in toxic relationships because they felt like home.
• Apologized for being too much and not enough in the same breath.
• Mistook struggle for strength, and exhaustion for excellence.
• Believed love had to be earned and rest had to be justified.

Thank you.

Thank you for surviving.

Thank you for being everything I needed at the time.

But I’m not her anymore. And she can’t come with me.

She was built to survive. I was born to thrive.

And to do that, I have to stop clinging to the woman who was just trying to get through the day.

I have to stop bending myself to fit into rooms I’ve outgrown.

I have to stop wearing my pain like it's part of my personality.

👑 Reinvention Starts With Audacity

Here’s the truth: You don’t owe the old you a damn thing.

You don’t have to stay the same to prove how strong you are. You don’t have to keep carrying that armor just because it used to protect you. You don’t have to apologize for wanting more.

There is no trophy for loyalty to a version of you that is no longer aligned with your healing.

Let her go.

With love. With compassion. With grace.

But let her go.

Because the version of you that’s rising?

She’s softer. She’s wiser. She’s clearer. And she doesn’t need to earn her worth through suffering anymore.

🔥 So What Now?

You write new rules. You make space for ease. You surround yourself with women who don’t need you to bleed to believe you.

You build a life that doesn’t just look good but feels damn good.

And when guilt whispers “but you’ve changed…” You say, “Damn right I have. And I’m not finished yet.”

🚨 Ready to Reinvent?

If this cracked something open in you, it’s not a coincidence.

This is your invitation to disrupt the cycle for GOOD.

Join me inside the Survival Mode Exodus Membership a space for women who are done just surviving and ready to rebuild themselves from the inside out.

🔥 Monthly coaching

🔥 Soul-level support

🔥 A community that holds you while you rise

🖤 [Click here to join now] – Because your breakthrough isn’t coming. It’s here.